Morning Edition 2026-11-06 Price: Free, Obviously

The Daily

Fucking Stupid

A newspaper for the obvious

From the archive · 2026-11-06 ← Today's edition

From the Editor's Desk

We Regret to Report the Laundry Is Eternal, and Have Drawn the Obvious Conclusion

Every other problem in the house yields to owning less. One does not. We checked it against the definition of Hell and regret the match.

By The Editor

The Kitchen Desk

You Are Paying a Stranger to Cut a Block of Cheese Into Sticks

Build a week of grab-and-go snacks yourself on Sunday, once you know how long each piece actually keeps.

By R. Dunmore

The Kitchen Desk

Cook Carries Egg Up Mountain, Discovers Water Has Stopped Trying

Water boils cooler as you climb, so the seven minutes that produced a hard egg at the trailhead produces a raw one at the summit. The pot is not the problem. The sky is.

By R. Dunmore

Domestic Affairs

Eight Pairs Stand Between You and a Legally Interesting Underwear Situation

Owning the right number of socks is not a personality. It is a buffer calculation, and it fits on one line.

By Iris Petty

Domestic Affairs

Utility Bills Household for the Fifth It Stopped Using

Portland General Electric's residential customers used 20% less electricity in 2024 than in 2000 and paid 141% more for it. The appliances worked. The savings were collected by the unit price.

By Hollis Carver

Domestic Affairs

Editor Locates Hell in the Hamper; This Desk Locates the Thermostat.

You cannot end the laundry. You can stop making decisions inside it: one wash class, one buffer quantity, one identical load, forever.

By Iris Petty

Diversions · Puzzle of the Day

The Blackless Crossword

A grid with no blocked squares at all. Every letter is checked in both directions, and the across and down answers are the same words, which halves the work.

Attempt it →

The Sections