Morning Edition 2026-10-10 Price: Free, Obviously

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Fucking Stupid

A newspaper for the obvious

From the archive · 2026-10-10 ← Today's edition

The Kitchen Desk

You Are Paying a Stranger to Cut a Block of Cheese Into Sticks

Build a week of grab-and-go snacks yourself on Sunday, once you know how long each piece actually keeps.

By R. Dunmore

The Kitchen Desk

Forehead Pain Traced to the Roof of the Mouth, Where It Is Actually Happening

It is not caused by how much ice cream you eat. It is caused by how fast, and by where the cold lands. The pain you feel is not happening where you feel it.

By R. Dunmore

The Kitchen Desk

Cook Discovers He Has Been Paying for Water He Already Owned

Stock is not a recipe. It is the refusal to throw out the parts of dinner that still have a job to do.

By R. Dunmore

The Parlour

Selected Ghost Readings, and the Shelf That Would Catch Us Out

A reading list rather than an argument. Eight filings from the register that between them predict most of the rest, and the secondary literature the register was built from — including the book it went to for the bedsheet and came back from empty-handed.

By Constance Tally

Domestic Affairs

It Is Probably a Bee, You Have Never Met Most Bees, and One of Them Is a Fly

The small, fast, agile thing working your bush is almost certainly a bee, just not one of the two you grew up naming. A field key for the other nineteen thousand species.

By Wren Marsh

The Kitchen Desk

Tonight's Dinner Volunteers to Become Half of Tomorrow's Before You've Sat Down

The second meal is cheaper, faster, and better, but only if you design it into the first one tonight, while the oven is already hot.

By R. Dunmore

Diversions · Puzzle of the Day

Today's Maze

Trace a path from START to EXIT. Difficulty: Gentle. Pen, not pencil — we believe in you.

Attempt it →

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