Morning Edition 2026-09-18 Price: Free, Obviously

The Daily

Fucking Stupid

A newspaper for the obvious

From the archive · 2026-09-18 ← Today's edition

The Kitchen Desk

The Recipe Calls for Half an Onion and Files the Other Half Under Your Problem

Recipes are written in units the store does not sell. Here is what to do with the difference.

By R. Dunmore

Domestic Affairs

Flushing the Toilet Declares War on the Shower; a $40 Valve Brokers Peace

The scald when someone flushes is not a quirk of old pipes. It is an unregulated pressure split, and it has a standard part number.

By M. Plumb

The Parlour

Selected Werewolf Readings, and the Shelf That Would Catch Us Out

A reading list rather than an argument. Eight filings from the register that between them predict most of the rest, and the secondary literature the register was built from — including the scholarship on three real prosecutions, where a household paper is likeliest to go wrong.

By Constance Tally

From the Editor's Desk

Dear Reader: On Why Any of This Had To Be Written Down

We are a manual with a masthead. Everything in these pages is real, testable, and faintly insulting in how obvious it turns out to be.

By The Editor

The Parlour

Selected Vampire Readings, and What Would Catch Us Out

A reading list rather than an argument. Eight filings from the register that between them predict most of the rest, and the secondary literature the register was built from — including the books that would catch it out.

By Constance Tally

Domestic Affairs

The $140 Sheet and the $1,600 Sheet Are the Same Plant. You Are Paying for Which Continent Touched It Last.

Linen bedding spans a twelvefold price range for one fiber. We priced the whole bed three ways, did the per-night arithmetic, and checked what the money actually buys.

By Hollis Carver

Diversions · Puzzle of the Day

Spot the Difference

Our staff illustrator has prepared two versions of today's scene. Seven small details have been changed. Can you find them all?

Attempt it →

The Sections