The Parlour · From the Desk
Forty-nine filings sorted by when the events claim to have happened rather than by when somebody got round to printing them, concerning a creature whose dates are published a year in advance in every almanac — and a record in which, across two thousand years, exactly four households made a plan around them. I work nights. Every night. I have views.
By Casimir Vane
The Parlour
Eight rulings graded against the register: the head shot is the best-supported rule on either seasonal page, nobody has ever agreed on the cause, and the single most confidently known fact about the zombie arrives seventeen years after the founding film in a picture that was joking.
By Casimir Vane
The Kitchen Desk
Caffeine leaves at a fixed proportional rate, not a fixed hour. A quarter of the afternoon mug is still in circulation at bedtime, and the people who insist it does not affect them are the ones sleeping through the evidence.
By Vera Stipple
The Parlour
Eight rulings graded against the register: silver was invented for one picture and the man who invented it said so, the full moon is younger than the talkies, and the only rule that has held without a break since Rome is the one about the laundry.
By Casimir Vane
The Parlour
Fifty-three filings from the cane field, the farmhouse, the shopping mall and the apartment block, sorted by when the events claim to have happened rather than by when somebody got round to printing them — and carrying, over my objection, eighty years of documents in which the zombie is the injured party and 1968 is where the word changed sides.
By Casimir Vane
Domestic Affairs
The small, fast, agile thing working your bush is almost certainly a bee, just not one of the two you grew up naming. A field key for the other nineteen thousand species.
By Wren Marsh
The Kitchen Desk
The second meal is cheaper, faster, and better, but only if you design it into the first one tonight, while the oven is already hot.
By R. Dunmore
Diversions · Puzzle of the Day
Fill every row, column, and box with the digits 1 through 9. A single unique solution exists.
Attempt it →
The Sections
What the household owns, cleans, stocks, repairs, and shares its premises with.
Food, cooking, and provisioning meals that continue tomorrow.
What the household reads and watches, listed rather than reviewed, and kept here all year: the registers, the tens and the family files.
The puzzles page, and the strip. Sincerely presented. Quietly impossible.
Notes on the edition, and notices from the paper.
